5 Rules For Engaging With Women At Work

Johnny Dzubak April 18, 2012 5
5 Rules For Engaging With Women At Work

We all know we shouldn’t do it, but what we should do and will do are two very different things. A few weeks ago posted an article on why dating and romancing in the office is such a bad idea, so there is no need to rehash it. However, since we all know that some of you will go ahead and ruin your lives anyway, let’s put together a few rules to help us keep the damage to as little as possible.

  1. Keep the pursuing and flirting at work to a minimum – If you think she is interested in you and you want to pursue it, tell her that you and some friends are going out for some drinks and that she should meet you all out. This way the flirting and other such behavior stays out of the work place and you can get a better understanding of what her intentions are now that you are not in the office. Make sure that she knows it’s not a work function and that there is a primary reason you asked her to come out be it a music show, an art exhibit or wine tasting. This way it can’t be misinterpreted as a purely work related get together. You are looking to investigate this matter more and a concert or art show allows you to do this under the radar.
  2. Be honest about what your intentions are – The more you try to hide or game play this situation the easier it is to blow up in your face. If you know a co-worker is interested and you are interested as well, be honest about what you want out of the relationship. If it’s just sex then let her know. That very well might be all that she wants as well. No need to cover up what you want only to have either of you feel lied to or taken advantage of.
  3. Make sure that there is no evidence anywhere – Do not tell co-workers, take pictures or continue the flirting at work. You do not want to end up as gossip. If word starts going around the office that an affair might be happening then everyone’s views of the both of you can be challenged. This also gives others ammo to use against you in the climbing the ladder war. Whatever you do keep it between the both of you. Letting your buddy know the finer details of your tryst to win some cool points will only come back to bite you in the ass. Besides, cool people don’t have to talk about these sorts of things.
  4. Careful of social media – To outgoing and busy people, social media might not carry much weight. But for a bored and drama-filled person, rooting around in other peoples’ lives hasn’t been easier. It will not be too hard to put 2 + 2 together and realize that something is possibly going on and “possibly” is all most drama causing people need to get it started. Either have a separate profile for co-workers or do not connect with them at all through social networks. It can only lead to trouble.
  5. Make sure the other person is responsible – Yes it takes two to tango, but it only takes one to screw it all up. Try not to rationalize away red flags or bad behavior over a pretty face or perfect breasts. If you think the girl is a little off, then you’re probably right and you probably should not be encouraging an encounter. Then again, if you had that part of your brain working I wouldn’t have to write this article in the first place.

So go on and do what I told you not to do and hope for the best. At least follow our few simple rules.

5 Comments »

  1. avatar
    No shit Guru May 1, 2012 at 8:52 pm -

    NO SHIT! CAPTIN OBVIOUS !!!

    • avatar
      Johnny Dzubak May 2, 2012 at 3:21 pm -

      LoL you would think, I wrote this post because we get this question several times a month here. Now I can point to both posts without repeating myself.

      Thanks No Shit!

  2. avatar
    Socialkenny PUA June 2, 2012 at 5:53 pm -

    Rules of engagement?Sure!

    But the biggest downfall I see to banging a co-worker is that emotions get involved(on her part).Even on the guy’s part,he may feel jealous if other guys hit on her.

    • avatar
      Jordan Harbinger June 4, 2012 at 6:53 pm -

      …and the obvious pitfalls of potentially getting fired for causing workplace drama.

  3. avatar
    Maverick August 20, 2012 at 5:23 pm -

    I find the second point to be quite interesting. I felt that I was unsure of whether to pursue the girl at work since we work together. I should have been more honest about what my intentions are. That way I did not need to waste my time after finding out she was actually getting serious with this other guy.

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